Give Me One Reason to Stay Here: 3 Reasons You Feel Stuck


You've been staring at a blank Excel spreadsheet for the past hour. Your head is pounding. You run out for coffee. You look at your phone and only 10 minutes have passed. How much longer until lunch? You scroll your Instagram feed. Damn, everyone looks like they are having a much better day than you.

Does this sound familiar?

Are you living this very life right now?

It's so difficult to climb out of the soul-sucking vortex of our jobs, at times. Many factors play a role in why you don't just walk out on a Friday, middle finger in the air and not looking back. I'm here to hone in on three of the biggest reasons you are feeling stuck, and how to combat those feelings.

1. You're too comfortable.

While you might be miserable, you at least have a steady gig that pays for your incessant Lyft and Seamless habits, and you know what to expect every single day. The thought of doing something different is really scary to you. You might love who you work with, and count on those bitch and moan happy hour sessions every Thursday.  Let me drop some knowledge on ya: Comfort is not happiness. It's quite the opposite actually.

Try this instead: Focus on something you've always wanted to do but haven't — and give it a try, just once. Pay attention to how you feel. This could be something as simple as taking a dance class, or as extreme as skydiving. The point is to dip your toe into the pool a bit; before you know it, you'll want to cannonball.

2. Skills that won't translate.

When working with clients, often times I hear their pain points are around feeling as if their skill set is too niche and that they can't do anything else. If this sounds like you, I'd start by asking yourself a few key questions. Is it the thing that is boring you, or is it the company in which you are doing the thing? Once you have established that, it will be easier to understand how to get out of the rabbit hole you fell into.

Try this instead: Make a list of things you like about what you do and things you like about the company. See what makes you feel good. If the list comes up blank, then Houston, we have a real problem. Clarity is the biggest factor in determining what your happiness looks like, so these simple exercises can make all the difference.

3. You have no clue what you want to do.

OK, so we recognize you're too comfortable, you're making lists to help understand what you like about your work, but you're not getting anywhere. Am I getting warmer? That's perfectly OK because you've actually realized something important here. You need to be doing something else but aren't sure what it is. Spending time on this very topic will help you understand more about where you want to be (and deserve to be!).

Try this instead: Spend time on your hobbies, work with mentors or a coach to gain perspective, and put a plan together. The moment you decide to take charge of your life, good things will immediately happen. You have to invest time and energy, and maybe some money too. The alternative looks a lot more grim, believe me.

There are certainly more factors than just these three that contribute to staying stagnant in a role you hate. My advice here is simple: Trust your feelings and trust your gut. Surround yourself with a great support system that listens and encourages you to make these changes. I wouldn't be sitting here today writing to you guys if I didn't listen to my inner voice screaming at me telling to tell me I was being a coward (my inner voice is a bad b^tch).

If I hyped you up just a little bit to at least explore other options, then today was a good day (cue the music).